LYRICS:​​

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Fuck the IE, such a shitty place to be 

Fuck the IE, such a shitty place to be

Fuck the IE, fuck the IE (fuck Rancho)

(Fuck Pomona), such a shitty place to be (ain't nothing to do in the IE

(Egg Gang)Fuck the IE, shitty place (Fuck you)

Fuck the IE, such a shitty place to be

(Such a SHITTY place to be)

Fuck the IE, such a shitty place to be (Egg Gang for real)

shitty shitty place, such a shitty place to be

In the IE

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(Waaaaahhhhhh)​

ITS TOO MUCH! I CAN'T TAKE IT! 

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

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No no no no no no

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Zzzzzzz

Mom! Mom, there's a mosquito!

Mom you gotta get the mosquito!

There's a fricken mosquito I fricken hate mosquitos!

Ow he drinking my blood!

You fucken mosquito!

Prepare to die you fucken mosquito!

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This curse goes out to the inhabitants of Rancho Cucamonga, which includes the people I hate the most

You know who you are

Bad tidings upon you

Devil take you

May you never prosper

The first drop of water to quench your thirst, may it boil in your bowels

May the flesh rot off your bones and fall away putrid before your eyes

May your limbs whither, and the stench of your rotten carcass be too horrible for hungry dogs

May you fade into nothing like snow in summer

May you be accursed in the sight of God and hated by your fellow man

May you die without a priest, making the Almighty's curse rest on your children

This I pray

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You've been cursed! Hah! How do you like that, Rancho Cucamonga?!

My curse has been placed upon you!

How do you like them apples!?

No more Mr. Nice Guy, if there ever was one to begin with

Heh, well... I consider myself a nice guy until you get on my bad side

Most women never give me a chance, but I treat them with such kindness and chivalry

But all they ever want is Chad who treats them with no respect

Why won't Stacy notice me for the kind gentleman I am?

I really am a nice guy once you get to know me but these women, these modern day women who I tend not to get along with, never give me a chance

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This curse goes out to the inhabitants of Pomona

The city of lust, greed, disgust, and single mothers

There has been unfairness done to me

I summon the elements, I envoke them

I conjure them to do my bidding

The Four Watchtowers shall lay their eyes and minds

There shall be fear and guilt and bad blood

There shall be submission and no pity

I point the threefold law against thee

Against thee it shall be pointed threefold

A hundred fold is the cost of my anger and pain

These shall be bonded by fear

Blinded by the pain

Blinded by me

Binded by me

Cursed by me

So mote it be!

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This curse goes out to the inhabitants of Riverside, the city of gluttony

One and a half pounds of ground beef

A fourth of yellow onions, finely chopped

Two thirds of a cup of seasoned dry breadcrumbs 

A third cup of cold milk

One large egg, lightly beaten

​Half a teaspoon of kosher salt, it must be kosher!

A fourth teaspoon of coarse ground black pepper

Two pounds of potatoes, peeled and cut into one inch chunks

A third of a cup of unsalted butter

One cup of whole milk

One teaspoon of kosher salt yet again

A fourth teaspoon of corse ground black pepper

Half a cup of bacon bits, cooked and crumbled

And one cup of cheddar cheese, shredded

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The next curse goes out to the inhabitants of Ontario

Yet another city of lust and manwhores

Which seems to be a common theme in the Inland Empire, which is pretty curious

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees Fahrenheit 

In a large bowl, gently combine the beef, the onion, the breadcrumbs, the milk, the egg, the salt, and the pepper together

Press the meat mixture into a 9x9 inch baking dish

Bake the meat mixture, uncovered, for fifteen minutes

Drain the excess fat

While the meat is cooking, in a large pot, add the potatoes with just enough water to cover them

And bring the potatoes to a boil over high heat

Cook the potatoes until they are tender, about fifteen minutes

Drain the water from the potatoes

Add the butter, the milk, the salt, and the pepper to the potatoes and mash to combine

Spread the potato mixture over the meat and top it with the bacon and with the cheese

Bake the meatloaf until the bacon is sizzling, the cheese is bubbling, and the potatoes are slightly crispy, about fifteen minutes

And then, serve

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ATTENTION ALL INLAND EMPIRE RESIDENTS: FUCK YOU

The Inland Empire is a horrible place to live, fuck you for living there

You have been placed under my curse and I will not be lifting it anytime soon

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Yup, you've been cursed

You've been placed under my curse and I will not be lifting it

If I were you I'd be pretty scared right now because uh, my curse, it's reaaal dangerous

It's um, it's really gonna get to your head is what it's gonna do

Well it's a curse

You know, a curse is what it is

No, I won't lift it

So stop asking

My curse is, it's very evil and dark

Um... you might be wondering what this curse entails

I would say stay away from close family members... as you are now attracted to them

Yup, my curse has given you an attraction to your own family members

I'm sorry I uh, I'm just the messenger 

Well, and the curse giver but you're the one who's attracted to your family members not me so... 

Yeah...

Kinda weird....

You know, I mean I know it's like, you can't really control it

You know you're cursed, you have to feel that way, but I mean it's still weird, right?

It's like weird

Like

You're a weird person

Like come on, incest is just gross, and you're into that

Regardless of whether or not it's "because of a curse"

You're still into it-

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It's such a shame our friendship had to end

Purple Pain, Purple Pain

Purple Pain, Purple Pain

Purple Pain, Purple Pain

I only wanted to see you underneath the Purple Pain

Honey, I know I know I know times are a-changin'

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(Right here I scream a bunch of dumb stuff in Latin that I am not even gonna try to transcribe)

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Heh heh, goodbye (goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye)